The tragedy of the British ocean liner RMS Titanic in the early hours of April 14 to 15, 1912 is known worldwide. Without intending to trivialize that ill-fated fact, I propose a reflection.
Regardless of the technical and rescue means that we have today – unthinkable a century ago – what would that shipwreck have been like if, at that time, the dominant mentality had been what certain media and politicians are trying to impose on us today? With the mentality of that time, among the survivors there was what today would be called a «gender gap»: 70% of them were women and children. What would have happened today?
A cover officer gives the order to the passengers: «We are going to evacuate the ship! Ladies and gentlemen, the order of evacuation will be that of women and children first.»
– Why ladies and gentlemen? You are a transphobic! – Object a progressive passenger.
– What do you mean by women? I am a woman enclosed in the body of a man, I want to go first. – A gentleman with a long beard adverted.
– You are not really a woman, you are a heterosexual white male, that is, triple oppressor. – A feminist shouts.
– I am a girl locked in the body of an old man, I want to save the first! – An old man with pigtails exclaims.
– And why should the first to be saved be all human? My cat also deserves to be saved, you are a speciesist! – An animalist shouts.
– Please, we stay here if necessary, but save our five children. – Aa father and a mother of a large family beg.
– To be annoyed, because of families like yours we have climate change. – Says a radical ecologist.
The cover officer resigns and lets the passengers embark as they wish. Finally, an equality committee is formed to ensure that 25% of men, 25% of women and 50% of pets, embark on all the boats.
– We want an exclusive boat for the LGTB collective. – Indicates a militant of the queer movement.
– And why? You are all men. – The feminist complains.
– But we are a historically oppressed collective and we must be compensated with positive discrimination. – The queer answer.
– We also want our own boat, which governs the Islamic law. – A Sudanese Islamist exclaims with vehemence.
– But there are only six Muslims on board. – The cover officer says.
– No problem. Look for some passengers willing to convert to Islam, but who are not Israeli citizens.
– But there is an Israeli Arab on board, what do we do with him?
– Israeli Arab? That’s impossible! – The Sudanese screams furiously.
– Yes, sir, he is a Bedouin officer in the Israeli Army. – The sailor points.
– Well, tell him to go in another boat.
In the final moments of the sinking, the orchestra of the ship begins to play the chords of «Nearer, my God, to Thee».
– It’s a scandal! Stop playing, this is a secular ship. – A laicist shouts from one of the boats.
– I hope the repertoire includes pieces of Muslim, Shinto, Buddhist and Zoroastrian music. And also some atheist song. Otherwise, I plan to file a complaint with the captain. – Object a progressive passenger from the stern.
– Surely the priest and the musicians have agreed to convert those who remain on the ship, go retrograde! – A disdainful communist commented from another of the boats.
Once in the boats, the survivors realize that there are people in the water.
– Look, that man is drowning! Let’s go back there. – A sailor exclaims.
– Of that nothing. When I was on board he opened the door for me to pass, he is a macho! – The feminist shouts.
– And I also heard him say that he was Trump’s voter, what’s to drown! – An antifa exclaims.
– We must be tolerant. We can propose that you assume the LGTB thesis and the right of women to abort as a condition for us to join the boat. – A progressive points.
– And if he goes away then we throw him into the water. – The antifa says.
In another of the boats they are organizing the rations of food and water of which they have and the norms of cohabitation to borto. A progressist woman throws ham and bacon overboard.
– What are you doing, ma’am? You can not throw away the food. – A sailor saids.
– If there were a Muslim on board it would be disrespectful to eat ham and bacon in front of him. – The progressive woman affirms.
– But ma’am, there are no Muslims on board, they go in that boat in which there is a Sudanese shouting.
– But imagine that we rescued one, we must be cautious. – The progressive woman responds.
– Hey, they’ve thrown me ham on top! – A man shouts from the water.
– Look, it’s the Bedouin officer of the Israeli army, let’s go and save him. – The sailor shouts.
– Of that nothing, this boat is vetoed to Zionists! – A member of the BDS movement shouts.
– Besides, we are already many. An idea has occurred to me! I’m going to dedicate a tweet with the hashtag #SaveTheBedouin. – Says the progressive woman very proud of herself.
– I know we can not save him, because we’re too many, but I’m going to cry for him for a moment, he deserves that gesture. – A Canadian liberal says between tears.
The Israeli officer ends up drowning. A boat with Poles castaways who came to save him can not make it in time.
– You see? The Poles have let him die. – The progressive woman shouts from another boat that was closer to the deceased.
– We should not let them board any boat. They are racists. – The BDS activist shouts moments before refusing to save the Israeli officer.
– And now they’re praying for the deceased! Go intolerant, fascist, far-Catholic and far-conservative! The dead man was a Muslim! – The progressive woman shouts after tweeting in the hashtag #SaveTheBedouin.
– But look, the boat of the Poles has saved a Jewish castaway, so racists do not seem. – Comment a survivor.
– Surely they let more Jews drown. I read in my favorite newspaper that these Poles are very bad people. – Says the progressive woman while still tweeting and the Poles come to save other shipwrecked.
In one of the boats they carry a lot of pets. An animalist has managed to save as many as he could.
– Now we must organize the rations in an equitable way. – The animalist says.
– If you give the food to those parakeets, to the cat, to the five dogs and to the other animals that you have saved, we will not survive. – An old woman complains.
– Are you suggesting that we let the animals die? That is speciesism! – The animalist shouts pointing to the lady.
– I think we can survive by eating a more reasonable diet. Let’s leave all the meat for the dogs and the cat. – A vegan points.
– But if we do not have the energy to row, who is going to do it? The parakeets? – A sailor says.
– We can not decide who will live according to the ability to row, that would be discriminatory. – The animalist complains.
Did all this seem absurd to you? If so, then think why it does not seem absurd to you that nonsense like these are prevailing in our society even through the laws …
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